The Sound of Everything Burning Beautifully

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Lyrics

When I was seventeen I broke the law
Then cried to Mak and blamed it all
On friends I don’t talk to anymore
Now I’m older, still sore
Living off gig jobs with a master's scroll
Selling my hours to empty goals
Abah said Jangan malu tanya arah
But no one ever shows you the map

Now I’m in my twenties, never sleep
Caffeine in my coffee I don’t even drink
They pay me just to hear me speak
On apps that eat away at me
Tak semua sukses itu suci
Sometimes your network’s your rezeki

The more I know, the less I feel
I made this bed, now I lie still
I scroll, I scroll
In my mind
In my head
No escape
Just vibes and debt

Is this what growing up sounds like
I don’t wanna know, I don’t wanna know
Burnt toast, fake smiles, and tomorrow’s clothes
Ash in my shoes but nowhere to go
Everything was burning… beautifully
And I just let it be
Don’t save me
Don’t pray for me
I’m still learning how to breathe

Used to be depressed, now I think I am
Love doesn’t fix what you don’t understand
Your partner’s not your therapist 
No offense, but that’s just it

I’m insecure when I’m on my own
Can’t even walk one street alone
(whispering) Just moved out, got a house, not a home
Bought furniture to hide the echo
From kampung dreams to city noise
Still feeling like a rented voice
I light the flame and watch it grow
‘Cause if I can’t fix it, I let it glow

Is this what growing up sounds like?
I don’t wanna know, I don’t wanna know
Is this what burning out feels like?
I don’t wanna go, I don’t wanna go
Everything was burning… beautifully
Let it burn, let it teach
Let it scorch, let it reach
Even fire can heal, if you believe